10.03.2025

You’re not a good friend. There, I said it.

You’re not a good friend. There, I said it.

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You’re not a good friend. There, I said it.

Stop telling your team that your family and trying to be their friend.


There’s too many blurred boundaries and odd expectations when we think about friendships and family ties.

Work is work. Colleagues are colleagues.

But, if you want to try and “be friendly”, try these:


❌Don’t comment on personal attributes. A manager doesn’t need to compliment their subordinates eyes.
✅Recognise and reward good quality output and high performance.


❌ Socialise excessively with your team outside of work.
✅ Join team events occasionally, but maintain professional boundaries.


❌ Try to be ‘one of the gang’ by gossiping or oversharing.
✅ Be approachable and open, but keep conversations professional.


❌ Ignore conflicts to keep the peace.
✅ Address issues directly and fairly to maintain a healthy work environment.

❌ Micromanage every detail to ‘help’ your team.
✅ Trust your employees and empower them to take ownership of their work.


❌ Force team members to share personal struggles.
✅ Let them know you’re available for support without prying, and if concerned then notify your HR dept.


❌ Make exceptions for favourites or bend the rules to be ‘nice.’
✅ Be consistent and fair in how you apply policies and expectations.


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Founder of HR Habitat, award winner of "Best HR & Employment Law Consultancy, 2024" title. As featured in BBC Oline, BBC Asian Network Radio, Telegraph & more. 

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